A bit of polyester goes a long way... why I'm embracing the 80s

We needn’t mentioned here that I’m a sucker for pin-up style.  Let’s face it, there are certain hip-to-waist ratios that prevent one from wearing anything but full-circled skirts... or a muumuu.  This is not something I am unhappy about. When you’re as irritatingly theatrical as I am, skipping through your day as if an extra in a Lucille Ball film is hardly a chore. A need, equivalent to that of breathing, to belt everything placed on my body is a blissful reality.

My only beef about a vintage obsession is that it can be quite expensive to maintain.  Yes – I’ll grant you it’s all relative. I could have an obsession with bespoke Hermès belts or eating diamonds (I watched a programme where the subject was addicted to eating foam from old sofa cushions – that’s a nice, budget-friendly obsession right there)… so in THAT way, it’s not expensive.  But it’s hardly cheap. Like any 50s-lovin lass I too obsess over Collectif, Vivian of Holloway and The Pretty Dress Company  and have some great numbers stashed away... but  for me to be able to dress as I want while also funding the gas supply to my flat, I need a different approach. 

​That’s why I've reacquainted myself with the 80s. I'd conservatively estimate that 80-90% of my wardrobe is now “vintage” items from the 80s (I love that Etsy ranks vintage as anything made before 1997… seriously).  So here are my Top 5 reasons for why you too need more 80s vintage in your life:

1. Polyester.  This glorious fabric is so completely unbreathable that you'll need only pair your frock with a light jacket to survive even the harshest Glasgow winter (just be sure to invest in very, very good deodorant. You friends / family / fellow train passengers will be grateful). It's also synthetically fused into shape so NO IRONING required. Hello perfect pleats straight from the washing machine!​
2. Shoulder pads. Why are we weird about shoulder pads people?! When you have the previously mentioned hip-width (nice way of putting ‘bum size’) of a small dining table you need to BALANCE THAT SHIT OUT. Shoulder pads square out your shoulders to give you a waist/illusion of a waist and balance those saddle bags right out.
3. Mid-length. The day I discovered the “midi length” filter on ASOS was only ever-so-slightly surpassed in perfection by my wedding day. Honestly, how hard is it for the world to produce garments to cover one’s knee cleavage?  The 80s was a little window of calf-length goodness that hasn’t been seen since the arrival of 60s Mod.  Seriously, I'm talking classic Lady Di 80s fashion (you know, before she got to the effortless cigarette-cut-trousers-plus-oh-so-chic-flats-and-shirt phase).
4. Readily available. Seriously, charity shops / vintage stores / the side of the motorway - the world is overflowing with this stuff.
5. As per item 4: it’s bloody cheap. ​

​So, in celebration of the glory of the 80s, I thought I’d showcase this top-to-toe outfit that came in at only £47. If we keep in mind that the shoes, under-top, belt and tights came in at £42 you can perhaps see why my 80s love-affair has no end in sight.